Attention all Losers!

So you’re a loser.  Not a Loser loser, just a person who loses or misplaces things.  If you are like me, you always find what you lose, but it does cost you some time and frustration.  As a fellow loser, let me share some tricks that have helped me along the way.

KEYS:  Keys are one of the most common things to lose or to misplace. You leave them in your pocket, throw them on the desk, throw them on the table, leave them in your coat or even your car.  You are at your destination so keys are just a nuisance at that point and you are ready to put them down.  I’ve seen this gadget where you attach this special key chain to your keys and then you whistle to find your keys.  This requires two things, 1) you know how to whistle, and louder than a whistle-like blow and 2) you don’t have a dog that thinks you’re going to take him for a walk every time you whistle.  If your dog comes every time you whistle then your solution could be to attach a fancy key holding collar to your dog.  You would always know where your keys were as long as you always knew where your dog was.  Too bad you couldn’t attach your phone or remote control to him too.  But honestly, the easiest thing is to have a cute dish to throw your keys in or a cute key holder hanging on your wall like I do.  You get yourself in a habit of putting your keys there and trust me, after awhile, it’s a miracle; you never lose your keys at home anymore.  This solution does not help you with people who lock their keys in their car when they go places.  That’s what Onstar is for! You just call Onstar and they say, “Oh, hi again, Mrs. Costello, do you still have that cold you had last week….how did Megan’s test go”….. and then they unlock your car.

SUNGLASSES:  Sunglasses are another item easy to put down and forget where you left them and you run late for your appointment because you are in a mad search to find them before you leave the house.  Again, solution is a cute place to put them.  We have this hanging rack in our kitchen that seriously has like twelve pairs of sunglasses hanging from it.  It’s quite a conversation piece when people come over because it’s a bit obnoxious but everyone in our house can always find their sunglasses.  (The dog won’t keep these on, so don’t even try my other idea.)

ATM/CREDIT CARD:  If you’re like me and you’re a pocket girl and even though you have over fifty purses (and continue to buy more because one can never have too many purses) you still want to throw your cards in your pocket instead, then you have probably laundered money….or at least your debit card.  Twice when I have misplaced my debit card I have found it in the dryer.  Yes, it still works and it’s nice and shiny too.  However, I do not recommend this process.   Instead, buy one of those cute little rectangle, folding card holders with a clasp.  You can easily throw this in your pocket or your purse without the risk of a single card falling out.  And if it goes through the wash, you will still be able to see your security code afterward.  Note:  putting debit cards, etc. in your pockets drives your anal, organized friends and family members crazy to see you do this and they will continue to buy you cool purses for every occasion in hopes you get the hint.

REMOTE CONTROLS:  First of all, you must have a universal remote because your odds of losing the remote controller increase with every additional remote controller you own.  Second, make sure it’s fairly large, so you can see it or feel it in the cushions or under the couch. It seems as if no one can return the remote controller to the cute designated basket.  So my only advice is to purposely misplace it a few times and make the kids operate the TV as if in the olden days and actually have to push the buttons on the television (which many will not know how to do) and after they realize all the exercise they will be partaking in with getting up and down to control the TV, they will then begin to remember to put the remote control back in its proper holding place.

CELL PHONES:  If you are like my family you constantly hear, “Call my phone so I can see where it is” and then later after you find it you’re like, “Shoot, I missed a call!” Hopefully if you have an IPhone you have the “Where’s my IPhone?” app.  I’ve never used this and am hoping it will work if I lose my IPhone someday but I have a secret concern that I will somehow need my IPhone to use the app to find my IPhone.  I’m sure that’s not the case but make sure you have the app anyway.   In my household, we have six people and six cell phones.  Phones get misplaced but always seem to turn up (and one time went through the wash) but our solution is a little odd.  We keep an old cell phone around so that until the lost phone magically appears again you can program and activate your old phone until you find the lost one.  Tip: Don’t just keep the old pink phones.  This tends to irritate the boys in the family while they are missing their phones – but it does make them seem to find their lost ones quicker.

Don’t feel bad for being a loser.  Just adjust your habits to adapt to your loser ways. Click on Comments below to leave a tip for fellow losers.